So, on a whim today, I decided to log in to my (former) college account and pull up my unofficial academic transcript. Just to see how many credits I would need to finish my B.A. in English.

Total credits required for a B.A.: 120

My total credits earned: 109

DUDE. I am only 11 credits away from getting that stinking degree! Look how close!!

See, back in fall/winter of 2006 when the whole divorce thing was hitting the fan, I finished that semester of college and went on indefinite hiatus. I moved back to Virginia in March of 2007 (almost one year ago–can you believe I’ve been back for one year already?!). Then I started my full-time job in April 2007 and my part-time/second job in November 2007.

And now I’m thinking. ok, I’m no Superwoman–but what if, once I pay off my credit card and pay down the second card–what if, instead of jumping into saving up for my first house, I finish those 11 credits and earn my degree first? I thought about it…and thought about it…and started to get really, really excited. Motivated, even. In that scary kind of way, sort of like when I first contemplated looking for a second job but didn’t know if I would be able to pull it off.

Well, I’ve been pulling it off for four months now. And that state of the credit card debt in the sidebar over there? It goes down by $800 every month. I’m totally doing it! Never mind the fact that I am a walking zombie most days, alternately frazzled/depressed the other days, and frighteningly gaining weight at a steady pace the rest of the days. Point is, I am ticking off my goals, both small and large, one goal at a time.

So…who’s to say that I can’t take one class per semester and check off those credits, one by one? 11 credits are, what, 4 classes? So close!

It’s become yet another big reality check for me since moving back–employers kind of, well, pay more when you have a Bachelor’s degree. So it would appear, anyway. Case in point: I have an Associate’s degree. Actually, I have two! ha! (One is in Liberal Arts, the other is in Information Systems.) And um, yeah, despite that fact–I have two jobs. You figure out the logic in that one!

There is, of course, the constant issue in my life, the ever-present freakin thorn in my paw: money. I’ve applied for financial aid in the past, only to be offered nothing more than student loans. And I really, really don’t want to go that route. I’m in enough debt as it is! And getting out! I don’t want to accrue more. But it’s worth a try to apply for financial aid and see what happens. Maybe a fall 2008 start date isn’t completely unrealistic, if I can coax all the stars and planets into alignment to see this happen.

This line of thinking completely puts a damper on my Plan A, which was 1) pay off the credit card debt, 2) save up money for the down payment on a house, and 3) buy a house and finally get away from Le Chateau de Parents INSANE. sigh. But I think it makes more sense to finish college first, and then try to buy a house…right? That would be the smarter thing to do?

And I really am trying to make smart choices from now on. I can’t tell you enough how many regrets I have about the past. I know, I know. People say you shouldn’t live with regrets. But I do! I have them. In plenty. Things like not finishing college before getting married, getting married in the first place, etc. etc…but what can you do? Can’t go backward. All I want to do now, though, is try to be smarter. And maybe in doing so, I can make my future better and I, in turn, will be happier. Maybe. I hope.

So cross your fingers that I will either be eligible for financial aid, or will miraculously (summoning those aforementioned stars and planets) win the lottery tomorrow night. By the way, did you hear about the Mega Millions winners in Georgia? $275 million. Millions! Of dollars! Even in the lump sum, it was well over $160 million, or something. I should only be so lucky.

In the meantime, I’m off to sprinkle fairy dust in the general direction of those pesky stars and planets. (And shaking some at the federal student aid people can’t hurt either.)